HATERS are BITCHES & WITCHES !

I’m in the midst of reviewing for my Philosophy1 exam on Tuesday, but eventually, those f*cking, ef*ing, and irritating HATERS just passed through my head that caused me to do this blog.  Just this morning, I checked out my fan videos on Youtube (how many already the views, the likes & dislikes and comments are). What I found out while reading some of the comments was IMMENSELY MADDENING!

There were these TWO PERSONS (he/she who should not be named) who commented on one of my FanVids. I was really ANGRY reading their BASHING about Yuri Chinen (an IDOL whom I love and care the MOST).

the bashing comments (>.<)
click picture to enlarge 

Holy sh*t! Those witches don’t have the right to say that to my dear Chinen.  They’re so mean! Honestly, I really wanted to disagree and fight back but since I know that Chinen & Hey!Say!JUMP (and other JE boys) don’t like fans that are TROUBLESOME, I JUST ZIPPED MY MOUTH.

But then again, IF THOSE JUDGEMENTAL and WICKED bitches still keep on criticizing Chinen ENDLESSLY… then the rope of my PATIENCE will certainly BREAK. I’ll fight back for sure!

I’LL STAND UP FOR CHINEN NO MATTER WHAT! I KNOW HE DOESN’T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT ME, BUT I CARE A DAMN ABOUT HIM!!!  I LOVE HIM SO SO MUCH THAT I GET HURT TOO WHEN SOME PEOPLE SAY HARSH THINGS ABOUT HIM!!!  >.<

Just in case you’re a Chinen fan like me and you want to check out my FanVid, you’re free to watch it ne~ 

Ps: I wrote this last Sunday but due to many school works, I only had a chance to post this now >.<

Also, at this moment, I don’t already have any grudge against those commentators. :))

Yuri, Please take me FARAWAY

Another fan video again that I made out of agony.

This was really weeks ago since I made and uploaded this on Youtube.

And as usual, Yuri Chinen is the content. Every day I just realize how much discrepancies we have in life, in my BITTER DREAMFUL LIFE. Every day, the distance is always SO FARAWAY. He’s REALLY my OUT OF REACH DREAM.

Even if LIFE ALWAYS GETS HARD on me, my feelings for him just keep on stronger and STRONGER as time passes by. I’M INLOVE WITH HIM and ALWAYS WILL BE.

Chinen’s Girl-look-alike (just a short quick post)

Ohgo Suzuka 

kirei deshou? :D

I just happened to search this girl over the internet. She’s so BEAUTIFUL, right?

OFC she SHOULD BE PRETTY because her face has resemblance to Yuri Chinen’s <3

HAHAHAHA :DDDD

I've first seen this photo in a Chinese Microblog. Since it’s a cutie little girl that really looked like young Chinen, I saved it on my lappy and made it as my profile picture on Facebook. I really didn't have any idea who’s this baby girl until my friend Keina commented on the photo. She said it was the girl from Memoirs of Geisha. Out of curiosity, I searched the child actresses that were in the drama. And the name, “OHGO SUZUKA” came out. I searched pictures of her in google and OH MY GOSH, SHE’S DEFINITELY CHINEN’S GIRL-LOOK-ALIKE!!!

Umika cho kawaii!

I have always thought that UMIKA KAWASHIMA is the ultimate GIRL VERSION of Chinen but NOW, I found someone who steal the NO.1  SPOT. ^_^

Ohgo and Umika are BOTH KAWAII and KIREI ne?

Sometimes I wonder if Chinen likes their type. Huhuhu. This is starting to hurt.

well, KAWAII GUYS ARE SUITABLE FOR KAWAII GIRLS, agree?

This definitely HURTS on my side. Hahaha T.T (*laughs then starts to cry*) 

They're so NICE I'm gonna LOVE them EVEN MORE

I’m so happy right now! This happiness is really an inexplicable one. I have new found FanGirl FRIENDS and I’m loving THEM so SO MUCH! They are really nice which makes my depression about college life be gone. They are six but I’m having a CLOSER relationship with only the three of them. I’m hoping that the others can also be much closer to me at the right time. I’ll introduce these cute girls one by one :DDD

First is Chiara pronounced as Ki-ya-ra. At first, I was really intimidated to talk to her. We are classmates in recitation class of one of our DevCom (Development Communication) series that is DEVC 50 (Science Communication). From her outside appearance, she’s really someone I couldn’t approach and had a friendly conversation with. I just didn’t know why but that was my impression. There came a time that we were grouped by our Professor. Chiara and I incidentally became groupmates. At first, we only talked about anything project-related but we never talked about anything besides that. Honestly, I couldn’t remember how we ended up talking about anime, one of my interests. When I had to sleep over at Chiara’s place because of our group project, we had a little bonding when we watched KOIZORA (Sky of Love). It was really a heart-warming Japanese drama which I’ve watched second time already during my sleep over. Chiara really liked it which made me glad. She flailed over Haruma Miura’s handsomeness. HAHAHA xDD

Haruma Miura <3

Next morning we woke up early at 6 even though we stayed late at night doing our project. Because our class will start at 11am that day and because we were still lazy to get out of bed, we decided to watch some YamaChii fanvideos.  <3 <3 <3 I’m not REALLY EXPECTING that Chiara will FALL IN LOVE with my favorite OTP (Original True Pairing). Normal people will go EEWWW (disgusted) seeing a boy-to-boy relationship so I was really shocked looking at Chiara’s enthusiastic face. Since YamaChii is a couple that consists of SUPER CUTE (mecha kawaii!!!) guys named Yuri Chinen and Ryosuke Yamada, Chiara was really attracted to their SWEETNESS with each other. I was really genuinely HAPPY with her reaction at that time because she appreciated the boys, OUR BOYS. HAHAHAHA xDD

YamaChii OTP (rabu rabu!)

Chiara has now become a FANGIRL of Yuri Chinen and Ryosuke Yamada, and MOST OF ALL, the YamaChii OTP :D  Initially, she was really confused who she liked MORE between Chinen and Yamada. She liked them BOTH originally but NOW I think she grew up more FEELING OF LIKENESS to Yamada <3 She said she would never get tired of watching and looking at Yamada even if he’s a camera-whore. HAHAHAHA xDDDDD

Yey! He won Chiara's heart! :))

I’M IN FULL BLISS NOW, NOW THAT I MET SOMEONE LIKE CHIARA. I know that she’s someone who understands my feelings about the fandom I choose to LOVE. She’s one of the VERY FEW people whom I value that supports my interest, JAPAN LOVE. I LOVE YOU Chiara for being always NICE to ME, for being a FANGIRL and for BEING A FRIEND! :D <3

I really don’t care about outward appearances when making friends but Chiara is so PRETTY, ne? :3

Next post will be FOR JENAILE and JELAINE. Yeah, each other’s name has some letter alterations of the other. And that is because, THEY’RE TWINS, very CUTE twins! :DDD

Kinda SLEEPY now. It’s already already 12:41am.

Until next time!

Miserable Life

I always disappoint my parents. I feel like I want to die. I know that they are not happy having a child like ME. It’s so sad. I’m selfish, self-centered, hard-headed, useless and STUPID. I HATE my parents for being so strict. They really have high hopes when it comes to my studies. They want GOOD GRADES but I study in a University where every lesson just keeps on getting difficult every day. I’m really pressured by the aura that school gives me plus the pressure of my parents, I really have the feeling of liking death. I’m also getting tired of the fake smiles people around give me. I always feel that I’m being hated because of my FANGIRL personality. Many people get annoyed, I know. It’s so hard to hide my fangirl side since it’s the only thing that makes me happy every once in a while. In spite of the haters, I continue to show who I really am. There is this one saying, “when people you don’t even know hate you, it’s when you know YOU ARE BEST!”

Despite that saying, I STILL don’t think myself as superior to others, not even to the tiniest thing in this world. It has always been in my mind that I’m inferior to people. I’m a WEAKLING. A WISHY-WASHY PERSON LIKE MYSELF DOESN’T EVEN HAVE THE GUTS TO STAND OUT. I DARE NOT. I’LL ALWAYS BE IN MISERY. 

I Support and Love Ryutaro Morimoto

note: If you are going to watch this, please PAUSE the music in my music box on the left side of this page so that you can ENJOY watching the FANVID :))

I made a fanvid because I think this is the least I can do to support Ryutaro Morimoto. I'm a JUMP fan and obviously, Yuri Chinen is my ichiban but I also love the other members more than I suppose to. I don't want my most favorite JANIZU/JPOP group to be incomplete. THEY SHOULD BE TEN and ONLY TEN.
Ryutaro is my 4th favorite and I always look forward on seeing him in their performances, concerts, shows etc. He should be back SOON, I hope and pray. I, together with the JUMP fandom, will support and wait for you even if takes FOREVER. That's what I will believe from now on.
GANBATTE Ryutaro!!!

Love lots,
chiRina :))

Yuuki100% PV MAKING plus PV

Hello there!


I think no one has posted this yet so I’ll be sharing these. These are MF downlink links for Yuuki100% PV+ PV making. Yeah, PV making! 

I just saw these while searching in google. I really don’t know to whom I’ll give credits to because I can’t also see whose account is this. 

This PV making is far more FUNNY and ENTERTAINING than YUME TAMAGO. I’m regretting it now why I bought Limited A rather than Limited B release. *cries*

You’ll get to see Yamada and Chinen’s comical acts when they make such FUNNY FACES. YAMACHII, FTW!!! <3 and Yuma, he’s so funny TOO.. hahaha.. sorry for leaving him behind.. ^^V

Chinen is really ADORABLE in here!!! :3 Sorry for being biased, he’s my ICHIBAN after all.. hehe^^

YOU’LL DEFINITELY ENJOY THIS!

Ps: I do not own anything in here. So for the one who uploaded this on MF which I got to find, thank you so MUCH! Just tell me if this is yours so that I can give you proper credits. ^^;

these are some screencaps~

THE LINKS, DOUZO~

part1: http://www.mediafire.com/?n069u87bfi1y3tt

part2: http://www.mediafire.com/?sa5h6cxsfqtfa7t

part3: http://www.mediafire.com/?0m5ziw500u3u0m5

if you don't have any file joiners, you can download FFSJ here.

The downloaded video can be played in VLC player or MPC player.

ENJOY!

I can HATE everything but not Chinen Yuri

I'm starting to HATE everything around me right now. It's just too unfair living in this WORLD. People around you can make you cry any time and I really HATE that bitter reality. I'm stressed and always will be because I'm already in COLLEGE (define HELL). I feel like I want to burst out because of a lot of difficulties I'm encountering in school. I have failed a lot of my exams and I'm really ashamed of it. I don't know how to face my parents if they find out that my grades are fluctuating. I am really doing my best with studying even though I also do fangirling. I manage them in a way that neither one of them can be a hindrance to one another. I can now resist myself from fangirling if I have lots of school works to do. And if I have free time, I do fangirling in the most enjoyable way that I can. 

At this moment, I HATE my school from the bottom of my heart! I hate MANY people and things, the OTHER teachers, the fake friends, the users, the exams, the school works, the environment, the gloomy atmosphere, the noise, EVERYTHING! They make me the most miserable person in earth! They're the STUPID things that when I think of, all the bad vibes will ruin my mood. I really don't want to be like this... I'm not suppose to be like this. But the rope of my patience finally breaks and I can't keep this inside anymore. I'm bursting because of HATRED right now. Other things around me have been affected too, I guess it can't be helped. I get mad at my family and also friends and other loved ones. They don't understand a thing about me. They don't know how much misery I'm going through right now. Nobody cares and I'm getting weaker and weaker every day. I can't do this ALONE. I really can't.... Can I die now?

One person that I can't HATE is CHINEN YURI, honestly... He's a reason why I'm still breathing right now. Just a smile from him makes my day just fine. I really don't know how he became this much special to me. All I know is this is the feeling of LOVING someone dearly. He doesn't know me personally but I at least know some things about him because I'm an obsessive reader of his magazine interviews (thank you so much for all the translators!). More than words can express how much is my LOVE for him. He's someone that's very exceptional to my heart. I may sound INSANE right now but the feeling of loving HIM will never end until forever is over. 

I didn't know that it will HURT this MUCH

I really like her, truly I do. She has become a part of my life now because we've been friends. I thought she can already read and understand my personality. But I guess, I made a false impression on her. I didn't know that a FRIENDSHIP will sink as easy as that with ONLY a single post in FB. hahahahahahaha :'-((

I guess this is LIFE, my MISERABLE life. There's no such thing as PERMANENT into this world. I have to accept that our friendship will come to an end soon and yeah, it really came to an end the moment  she hesitate to believe and trust in me. Too bad for my life, I'm always like this. I've always been left out by people I thought I can share my happy memories and sweet times to. I still like HER indeed.. nope, I L<3VE HER! She's a friend and she already have a place in my heart. But she already did the first and last step to break our bonds together. I HATE TO BE ME! I'm hurting but since i don't want to talk and make a fuss about that stupid misunderstanding, the case will be closed right at this moment. I only WISH she understood what I've posted before she reacted but she didn't did that. I feel so little.. I don't hate her I'm just hurt. 

I'm really glad that I can rant my feelings here besides from FB because I don't really want her to see this post. 
SAYONARA, DEMO DAISUKI DA 'YO! I don't really want our friendship to end because I already grew up loving you as a friend even if we're only ONLINE friends but YOU already ended it up. I don't have the right to go against your will. 

Fangirling with my Okaa-san

Just awhile ago, me and my mother were watching the drama Nanako to Nanao which Chinen I think starred in here when he was 9? (not so sure about his age in here). I never thought that my mom would be that interested in watching it. I was like, 'is she sick?' because she suddenly wants to watch it together with me. My mom really doesn't support me in my fangirling activies (i.e watching, downloading, buying goods, FLAILING). She's against it because she thought I'm being crazy with WORTHLESS things. For me those things are not worthless because they're precious to me and I can't live LIFE without CHINEN. 

I'm really HAPPY right now because my okaa-san little by little accepting the FACT that SHE has a CRAZY FANGIRL DAUGHTER. hahaha. xD

YEAH, I'm really CRAZILY in love with CHINEN YURI, and I will not be tired of saying this over and over AGAIN! Back to nanako to nanao movie viewing, while me and my mom were watching it, I'll explain to her every important scenes because she's TOO LAZY to read the subtitles. She complains that it flashes real FAST. When the movie finished, she was gone out to watch a TV show on the living room (what a random person). She doesn't said a thing about the ending of nanako to nanao. And me, I was just explaining the scenes and ranting about Chinen's cuteness until the end of our movie viewing...After that, I did this blog. ^_^

I'm not REALLY a HAPPY FANGIRL

This is me wearing an ARASHI personalized shirt.. I'm indeed sucked at editing the design.. I must have put  a  DARKER shade of PINK so that the word "FANGIRL" can be easily noticed. 

I'm really happy when i first got this shirt. I wear it at school and I can feel that other people look at it. Maybe they're just curious what's on my shirt. Others said it's a Chinese character but oh well, it's the KANJI of ARASHI. One major reason why I love wearing this shirt at school sometimes, is because i just want to meet FANGIRLS too. I become very happy when I meet someone who has same interests as mine. 

To be honest I really like to be alone. I don't welcome new people to my life but if you're a fangirl or someone  I can see a resemblance of myself, then LET ME KNOW YOU so that I can know if you're someone I can TRUST on. When I started being a COLLEGE student, I have met lots of people and they're attitudes really are DIVERSE. I find others "user-friendly" and only few of them have been true to me. I really don't trust people so easily because of my past experiences of being betrayed and used. But still until now, I have been used by a lot of people at times. And because of that, I have to bear with it since I'm the type of a person  that remains her MOUTH ZIPPED. I'll just HATE them from the bottom of my HEART and wish that I would never ever meet them again in the FUTURE. 

Who is chiRina?

Hi there, I'm chiRina. I have something to tell you, it's NOT really my real name. I only preferred to be known this way. The name 'chiRina' came from my real name and the name of the boy I love. My real name is Catrina  and the boy that I love is Yuri Chinen. 

chi- came from CHInen

R- means RABU

ina- came from CatrINA

Thus, that's the etymology of my pseudonym.

I was born on the 23rd day of October, 1994 making me 16 years old right now. I'm a Filipino (firipin-jin)and I live on my country Philippines. 

I'm currently a college freshman taking up BS Development Communication in University of the Philippines Los Baños. 

To be honest, I don't really like studying. I indeed cram and that's the reason why I always have headaches and back-pains for staying up so late at night to do my school works.

Enough for the school-related stuffs.. I really have many interests in life and majority of it has something to do with JAPAN. I'm a FANGIRL and proud to be one.

I LOVE CHINEN YURI not just because he's my IDOL but I truly LOVE him as a GUY. I've fallen deeply madly crazily IN LOVE with HIM. I've been a fan for more than 2 years and will be celebrating my 3rd year in the fandom on JULY 14 this year. 

I became an anime otaku first before suddenly entering to Johnny's fandom. I love ANIME until now, it's just that I can't watch and anticipate many series because I have to bear with school. Thus, I'm not addicted to it as much as I am when I was in my high school years.  By the way, I used to collect anime figures and other anime stuffs! If I'll have a chance to go to an anime store, I'll definitely buy again so that there'll be additional items to the stuffs I'm possessing right now.  I also super LOVE to listen to anime OSTs. It's so nostalgic to remember all the good memories I have when I'm in the midst of my anime addition.

As a normal human being, I love GOD, my FAMILY, FRIENDS and other people WHO SEE MY WORTH.  I'm a random, moody, and mysterious person. I don't like opening up myself to those people who are narrow-minded and have the potential to misunderstand me. I also don't care if I develop HATERS. They're not important people so HELL, like I care! I am indeed CRAZY at times but THAT'S MY LIFE. HAHAHA